Nappy and Happy: The Basics

If you’ve been following me on twitter and facebook you’d know that last year I decided (not really, lol) to go natural.  I didn’t reaaally make the decision to go natural but once I realized that I was more than half way there, there was really no point in getting a perm again.  SO. Like I said, I didn’t mean to go natural AT ALL so when it happened I was totally unprepared and my hair (my roommates can attest to this) looked a complete mess. Split ends, a new texture I didn’t know how to take care of, ‘permed hair’ haircare products, I tried combing it while it was dry (if your natural you JUST cringed, HA!). I’VE DONE IT ALL. But, if you know me you know that when I decide to do something I obsess and research to learn everything I can about it.  Over my 5ish months being natural I’ve acquired some tips and tricks to help anyone beginning their natural hair journey.

ONE

GET COMFORTABLE WITH YOU NATURAL HAIR.

Kinky, coiled, curly, wavy, and nappy. All black hair is different and it’s important for you to get used to your OWN texture.  Its probably not going to swing around your head (at first) OR blow in the wind (at first). However, the more you wear your natural hair the more you’ll fall in love with it.  Give it some time and just look in the mirror at yourself with your new curls and kinks. When people say that going natural is an emotional/spiritual journey they’re not joking.

 

 

TWO

DO YOUR RESEARCH.

I cant emphasize enough on how important it is for you to research natural hair care and styling. From styling, maintenance, washing, detangling (sweet baby Jesus), protective styling, its all out there for you to just waiting to be found.

• Kimmaytube
• Innovativethinkin
• Mstanish1
• DPrincess28
• Naptural85
• Nikkimae2003
• Br0nzqt
• Curlychronicles
• Allthatsgold

All these Youtube hair gurus filmed and documented their hair journeys (usually from their big chops) and have awesome tips for keeping your hair healthy, strong, and growing long.  And the great part about it is that they all have different textures of hair!

THREE

 

READ INGREDIENTS.

When choosing products to put on your hair make sure you look at the ingredients! Stay away from silicones, mineral oils, petroleum (YUCK!), and anything with unnatural dyes or fragrances.  Look on the back of the product and try to find shampoos, conditioners, moisturizers that’s first three ingredients include water, aloe vera (juice or gel), or oils like olive, coconut, rosemary ect. For the record I use Giovanni [certified organic] Golden Wheat Deep Cleanse Shampoo every week and a half or so and Giovanni Nutrafix Hair Reconstructor as my conditioner (both of which I love love love).

If this continual search for products is a bother go straight to the source and make your own shampoo’s, conditioners, and moisturizers.  If I can do it you can too! I used African black soap shampoo, olive oil and coconut oil as my conditioner, and shea butter olive oil aloe vera gel vitamin e oil coconut oil all whipped together as my moisturizer.

 

These three basic tips should get you started on your natural hair journey! Ill link some videos below for some extra encouragement.  If they don’t let you view them on this site then just follow to the link to Youtube! Thanks for reading!

 

 

Duuuude.

In my alternative life I’d be tatted like Kat Von D.

I’d own one pair of nudies that I spent my last dime on, and I’d live in them.

I’d live in Paris, actually. Or somewhere in Brazil.

I’d have three boyfriends and a sugar daddy and I’d never get married.

I’d never wear a bra and I’d live in a classy little flat and iChat the people I love on my Mac.

[e - kisses]

Quick Question.

So I’m sitting here like any other  Wednesday evening organizing my thoughts and one T H I N G I had discussed with someone earlier in the week just jumped out at me. A guy, who shall remain unnamed, was talking to me about his past relationships.  He danced casually through the names of random girls he’d had flings with or ‘talked’ to since high school.. and then he stopped. Let me tell you, he even didn’t have to say it.  His face let me know that he was in love with whichever girl he was about to explain to me next.

And believe me, I get it.  I may come off as cynical and cautious but i’ve been in love and I believe it exists and i certainly respect it, b u t..

Then he dropped this phrase, he said:

[[she's the love of my life]]

whoa buddy.

I kept my composure, but what I really wanted to do was cock my head to the side and give him the O_o face. Waitwaitwait. you’re telling me that in your mmmmm 21 years of life you’ve stumbled upon the love of your life?! well wtf have I been doing for the past 20 years??! I’ve had two boyfriends, loved them both dearly. but love of my life?

nahh playa.

Well anyway, I was curious if most people would label one of the people they’ve dated between grade school and college as ‘the love of your life’ ‘the clyde to your bonnie’ ‘the Ron to your Hermoine’.. Even if the idea of finding your ‘soulmate’ in college is delusional, should I indulge? Is this more common than I thought? Like, a taboo subject that he just happened to speak candidly about. [Please] let me know.

Back Like I Never Left

Wow. Hey everyone. Its been a while hasn’t it.  I feel like I should explain where i’ve been all these months but I don’t even know my damn self so lets just pick up where we left off. Anyone who was a previous reader of my blog has probably noticed some significant differences between the old blog and this new one.  New sleek background and SUPPPER minimalists. L E S S is definitely more.

I definitely wanna do a lot more video blogs so definitely stay tuned for those.

On to more important things.

On twitter I follow(ed) this group of young (late twenties early thirties) black intellectuals, they all have Ph.D’s and debate and scratch each others backs and i love it. Back to the point, one of them (@dreamhampton) once tweeted something in response to someone criticizing her opinion on a subject. She said:

“Feel free to critque my work but I dont defend my writing”

I thought that was so bizarre b u t the more I thought about it the more began to agree. SO. That’s my new rule on my new blog. I just need to get things out. Stir things up a bit   Here are a few guidelines so you dont catch feelings off the things/ideas i decide to tackle:

• I say nothing with malicious intent, It’s legitimately how I’m feeling.
• You’ll only get upset with the things I say if theres some truth to them (in respect to you life)
• DO NOT text me about the things i write on my blog…. actually, go ahead, but 99% you won’t get a response.
• I LOVE featuring people so let me know if you wanna write!

Don’t get me wrong, if you ask me to clarify something I will. So don’t be scurred

Thats all, hope you enjoy the new blog.. have a wondrous day.

Mathematics

I fear that I will always be

A lonely number like root three

A three is all that’s good and right,

Why must my three keep out of sight

Beneath a vicious square root sign,

I wish instead I were a nine

For nine could thwart this evil trick,

with just some quick arithmetic

I know I’ll never see the sum, as 1.7321

Such is my reality, a sad irrationality

When hark! What is this I see,

Another square root of a three

Has quietly come waltzing by,

Together now we multiply

To form a number we prefer,

Rejoicing as an integer

We break free from our mortal bonds

And with a wave of magic wands

Our square root signs become unglued

And love for me has been renewed.

-Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay

GAGA–Oh La La.

Whether you love her or hate her, you have an opinion. What’s mine? Lady Gaga is an icon. Hating is pointless; Kanye said it best:

If they hate then let ‘em hate and watch the money pile up.

Her first album ‘The Fame’ topped charts in 4 different countries including America’s Billboard Top Electric Albums.  The album also attracted critiques attention receiving six grammy nods.  Keeping her momentum she released her second album ‘The Fame Monster’ which, she claims, is the manifestation of all the aspects of fame she fears.  Fear of love, fear of relationships, fear of fame itself.

I can’t lie. I was once a hater, standing outside the illustrious Bath Haus of Gaga, peering in at 3 foot tall should pads and full sequin outfits.  Especially after that horrid appearance in Beyonce’s ‘Video Phone’ music video. #fail. However, after seeing the video to her world famous single ‘Bad Romance’ the envelope was sealed. I am a Gaga fan.  The singing, fashion, dancing, EVERYTHING in that video blew my mind.

She has set herself up to be one of the most creative and artistic performers of our time.  She’s one of the few people that can sing and dance live while sounding exactly like her records. Even though she was robbed at this years grammys, IMO, she’s a true artist so she’ll just come back stronger next year. NBD.

Musical Influences:

• David Bowie
• Madonna
• Freddie Mercury

Where she got her name? “The Queen song “Radio Ga Ga” inspired her stage name. She commented: “I adored Freddie Mercury and Queen had a hit called Radio Gaga. That’s why I love the name… Freddie was unique – one of the biggest personalities in the whole of pop music.”"

My Favorite Tracks:

• Bad Romance
• Beautiful Dirty Rich
• Poker Face

For a taste, watch here..

Hopeless Romance Say What? ..what?

“Don’t. Leave– ‘cuz you’re my oxygen, without you I won’t. Breathe.”

-Wiz Khalifa, When U Find

My friends recently introduced me to Wiz.

I was happy to meet him.

But as I was listening to this song and thinking about my life and my friends life and life in general. Should we ever plummet so deeply, fearlessly in love with someone [other than family] that we cant function with out them?

A better scarier question is: Do we have a choice?

I shiver at the thought.

I mean, we all dream of the fantastic love affair where you fall head over heels for you prince or queen; but in a world where:

• 50% of first marriages end in divorce
• 67% of second marriages end in divorce
• 74% of third marriages end in divorce

It’s all hunky-dory chummy chummy but past the infatuation stage, is it really reasonable?

Please don’t write me off. I’m not THAT bitter black women. I’ve gotten my heart broken enough for a lifetime. I still believe in love and I dont think all negroes aint shit. In fact, I contemplate this question every time I’m in a relationship.  Its just that, when you fall in love with someone, you give it your all, and things still don’t work out you’re never the same afterwards.  You’re a little less eager, and once you jump [if you even do] you grab on to shit all the way down. Some people even dig in to the side of the cliff hanging on for dear life. You’ll never hit terminal velocity again. *pauses for people to look up the meaning to terminal velocity*

When we’re deciding who we should  share our heart with its easier to measure twice and cut once. Live for yourself, because thats who you’re gonna die with.

..Now A Days, It’s Exponential.

The past week and a half have been tested my maturity, sanity, I might even say my humanity. I’ve been taken to the edge and back.  The moment I’d been dreading for around a month walked itself, literally, in front of my face and posed. I even got my own personal #shoutout.

Cute&classy, I must say.

Some of you may know what I’m talking about, others of you I’m sure don’t.  The event is, beyond question, less important than the lesson I learned. I could’ve cried [very unlikely], it could’ve gotten physical [unlikely], I could’ve told them about themselves [likely]. But, I’m no longer in the business of misery.

I think I’m growing up. Buzz word: Maturity.

Am I?

I guess my idea of this whole ‘maturity’ thing is realizing that you’re not immortal. You realize that your actions impact those around you, for good or bad. These are the years where you define yourself as a person: Here I Am World, Deal With Me. *Shakes defiant fist in the air* *side eye to THE MAN*.. And this past week and a half I could’ve done the most but instead, I did me. And I loved every second of it. I have [little - no] time for ratchet freshman, cryptic cheshire grins, or atrocious attitudes. I guess the point is, things that would have mattered no longer do; because I’m growing up and…

*disclaimer: THE MAN = society & its made up rules.

Spotlight: Mark Jones Bey & Nutrition

The following blog was crafted by a guy I’ve known since my earliest days at Howard!

Mark Jones Bey is a sophomore, nutritional science major, from Los Angles, California, currently attending Howard University.  I’m spotlighting him and his views on nutrition because I’ve always found his worldview and personal beliefs interesting. He put the idea of ‘religion’ in a whole new perspective for me, and for that I thank him. So, thanks Mark!

Without further ado:

When most people are asked, “Do you want to live a healthier, happier life?” The answer is almost invariable an emphatic “YES!” an “of course,” or “duh”. The interesting thing is, however, living a healthy, happy life isn’t on the minds of most people. In fact, readers may think of a time they’ve asked someone or have been asked, “Oh, do you eat healthy?” It is often stated as if it is a stigma of some sort. As if eating healthy is an uncomfortable, scary thing. So one may ponder, “What kind of life am I living if it’s not healthy?” The opposite of healthy eating is… unhealthy eating. When a man is asked if he eats healthy, the response should be, “Yes, don’t you?”
The truth is every human being desires to be healthy and happy. Humans, therefore, should make health a top priority in their lives. There are three different holistic facets of health. They are the spiritual, mental, and physical. The most accessible, and easy to change, is the physical. 85% of physical health is determined by what the average person puts in their mouth. Certain genetic predispositions for disease can be kindled by an unhealthy diet, or abated by a healthy one. Many of us know, after eating some food we feel energized, while, after eating some food we get ‘the itis’. Why should any food we eat take energy from us? It shouldn’t! Food is for energy, not debility. So one of the most immediate things a person can do in order to positively change his or her life is to change his diet. We have three opportunities everyday to change our life for the better; they call them breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
As a Moorish Moslem, I do not consume anything that comes from animals. Islam itself means peace. The peace of Islam isn’t restricted to my family and friends, or other Moslems. The peace that is Islam should be spread to everything created by the great God Allah. No animals should suffer. Currently animals aren’t serving the purpose that God created them for. Animals are taken from the wild and are being bred for slaughter and milk. From birth until death their lives and energy are dedicated to others; stolen for the purpose of feeding humans. The beaks of baby chicks are severed, calves are taken from their mothers and used as veal, and cows are milked until their bodies collapse from exhaustion. Coincidentally, many other faiths teach non-violence through things like the Christian Ten Commandments. “Thou shall not kill,” isn’t prohibited only to other human beings; it is meant for all creatures created by God Almighty. It is said that if we all had to kill our food, we’d all be vegetarians. This is said because it takes a ruthless heart to hunt, or to cut the throat of an animal and see it writhe and scream just before it dies. Genesis 1:29 shows us where God prescribes fruits and vegetables as food for mankind. Islam itself means peace, yet many Muslims wage war on the peaceful lamb, and other animals. Christianity represents the word of God, yet we devour God’s creatures, and they fear us. Much like the two previous faiths, Buddhism, one of the most peaceful religions, recommends a tranquil coexistence with other species on the planet. In Buddhism there is a principle known as “ahimsa.” Ahimsa embodies the idea that every living thing is sacred and it represents non-violence. Yet Buddhists often eat animals. If the many faiths all teach that every living thing is sacred, then how dare we harm a living thing? If we can survive and thrive another way, how dare we harm a living thing?
When carnivores see a raw piece of meat, a dead animal, or the like, they all salivate because they’re meat eaters. If we were in the wild and we saw two things: a bowl of our most favorite fruit, and the dead body of an animal, which one would make us salivate?

Which one would we eat? We’d eat the fruit of course. Not only do we harm animals in our consumption of them, but also we harm ourselves. In every animal that is slaughtered are the stress hormones and adrenaline that were pumped into its bloodstream upon death due to fear, and all the waste that it was storing within its veins. Just as our bodies use our veins to transport waste, so do animals. Due to the fact that we eat the animals, we also eat their waste.
There are many other things besides meat that are bad for us. On top of meat we have fried foods, candy, sugar, artificial sugar, alcohol, fats, starches, processed food, and the list goes on. There are a few things that we can do however, to improve our health. The first thing would be to reduce our meat consumption to about two, three, or four times a week. We don’t need it with every meal. Most people outside America only eat meat twice, or thrice a week anyway. The second thing we can do is cut out junk foods. They’re called junk food for a reason! Slowly, or quickly, cut out all those sweets, sodas, snacks and processed foods. Thirdly, drink more water! Drink a lot of water. Start working up to eight glasses a day. Lastly, the most important rule, ONLY EAT FRUIT FOR BREAKFAST. Don’t eat heavy breakfast foods like eggs and bacon, grits, pancakes and waffles, or anything else. The body has just rested and we need food that will energize us for the day, not something that will weigh us down so we have to go hit up Starbucks later for energy! Overall include more fruits and vegetables in your lunch and dinner, but specifically eat fruit in the morning, alone. If you’re constitution is too sensitive to eat fresh fruit, eat dried fruits, nuts and bananas mashed up. I use this routine and it is very valuable. Everyday try and get five servings of fruits and vegetables; if you make a habit of doing this in the long run your health will improve. Replace many of the processed grains that have been enriched with whole grains like Rye, Spelt, or Kamut bread. They’re easier to digest and are healthier for you.
No wild animals die of disease; only man does. Wild animals die of old age. Many centenarians in Asia also die of old age. In fact, anyone who lives over one hundred years, dies in their sleep, everyone else dies of a disease. Refer to the reference list provided by Erin for further tips on books, documentaries, diet and eating healthy. Change your diet, before your diet changes you!

Agree? Disagree? Let me know in the comments and I’ll be sure to get your questions back to him. Or he might see them here and answer them himself.

In Response.

I’m no good at poetry, but Shihan is.. so listen.